Exhausting myself
[back][home][e-mail]
I'm writing this on October 10, 1997 and I still don't have a new exhaust
for my BMW after making my initial inquiry into an exhaust at the end of
May. Check this out:
My car (1991 BMW 318is) has had an aftermarket exhaust since I brought
it used in 1996, so its always been a little louder than normal. It had
a nice tone though, the kind that says, "my car is supposed to sound
this way and no, there isn't a hole in the muffler." Anyway, time
went on as it tends to do, and the noise from the tailpipe was growing
ever so gradualy until, like a frog who doesn't know the water in the kettle
was heating up until he boiled to death, I found that every time I drove
an appreciable distance, I would get a pounding headache. When I started
hearing little pops of back-pressure I knew it was time to do something.
That was late May, 1997.
I figured that since I had to replace the exhaust, then I might as well
go ahead and get a chip upgrade too. Don't ask me how that logic works.
Fortunately for me, Roundel had just featured an article about Mike Miller's
1991 318is that he was converting to a club car. I was happy to find that
someone else out there thought highly of this car, and the article was
very helpful in considering my own plans for upgrades. (BMW CCA does it
again! Thanks guys!) Mike mentioned that he had an Autothority
chip for the car, and that Autothority would work with B&B
Fabrication to create a custom chip/exhaust combo. Sounds good, so
opened the back page of the Roundel to get Autothority's number, and I
placed a call.
They knew Mike Miller by name, this is a good sign, and yes, they can provide
me with the chip/Exhaust combo for a mere $1,100. There is always something
unsettling about writing large checks, so despite the prospects of improved
performance, I dropped it in the mail with a little trepidation. About
a week later I recieved a call. After some discussion it came out "oh...you
have the M42 engine, that will be an additional $100 for the exhaust."
Oh well, I sent it. A month later neither check had cleared my checking
account, and I hadn't recieved anything from Autothority. A few weeks later
I called to check up on things and found that B&B had been back logged
with orders and hadn't made my exhaust yet, and apparently the checks wouldn't
be deposited until the order was shipped. This was fine, but I had a problem,
there was only a week left to renew my registration, and I had to inspect
the car to renew, and I needed an exhaust to inspect. I just couldn't wait
any longer, so I asked Autothority to send me the chip, but cancel the
exhaust and send me a refund, which they graciously agreed to do.
About this time UPS Teamsters, with
blantant disregard for the needs of the country, decided to go on strike.
Guess who ships UPS? Attempt #1 to send me the chip with the refund got
lost in the bowels of some UPS station somewhere. I was going to use the
refund to order a Remus exhaust from Bavarian
Autosport (for about half the cost of the B&B). The inspection
deadline came and went, but I managed to get it to pass and I re-registered
but I was still anxious to get a new exhaust because of the headache factor,
and I wanted the performance.
After another week or so, I called Autothority again, which resulted in
an apology and a promise to send another chip FedEx, and the refund by
mail. Fine, but rather than wait, I went ahead and ordered the Remus from
Bavarian AutoSport. A week later, I recieved the chip and a refund for
about 20% of the amount I was expecting. I also recieved a phone call from
Bavarian Autosport, "there are no Remus exhausts in the country...a
ship with 5 exhausts is leaving Europe today, they should be available
in about 4 weeks." Well, what can you do? The end was in sight so
I decided I could just suck it up until it arrived. Meanwhile, Autothority
corrected their error, and sent me the balance of the refund. I must say
that my intention is not to defame Autothority - they were always gracious
and apologetic and willing to work with me to make sure I was happy. I
haven't installed the chip yet, because I want to install the chip and
the exhaust at the same time.
I guess by now you won't be surprised to find that 4 weeks came and went
with no shiny new exhaust on my doorstep, so I called Bavarian Autosport.
Some research revealed that my particular exhaust was backordered by Remus
- with no explanation. This was not the fault of BavAuto or their suppliers,
which I understand, so I hold nothing against them. My BavAuto rep informed
me that Remus was claiming mid-November as the taregt date for delivery.
Needless to say, I'm thinking of installing the chip now, or I might never.
TWO MONTHS LATER...
Well...mid-November came...and went. No surprise there. At that point I was merely holding out for the sheer bliss of being able to tell people "see that chrome tip there? Took me seven months to get it." I've tried this out on a few people and surprisingly enough, they're not as amazed by this fact as I am, however, most of them think I'm stupid. Oh well.
The exhaust did finally arrive about a week before christmas (1997). I should mention at this point that an e-mail I had recieved during the waiting period had unsettled my heart a bit. It was from a German 318is owner who stated, "Remus doesn't make an exhaust for our cars..." Being that he was German and close to the parts source, I was inclined to believe him, but what was I going to do at that point? I had the distinct feeling that if I were to cancel my order, then five or six exhausts would show up on my doorstep, such being the nature of things. Anyway, when I gleefully deposited the car and the exhaust at Briarcliff Classic & Imported (BCI), I was just too relieved to think about that e-mail. Never the less, I wasn't the least bit surprised when the mechanic called the very next day to tell me that exhaust didn't fit.
"Your flange has two bolts, the flange on the exhaust has three...plus the pipes are of different diameters, and the hangers your supplier sent you are for a stock exhaust, they don't fit this thing. What do you want to do?"
Kill someone...
I took a trip to the shop to verify the mechanic's statement and I saw for myself. There was no way that the exhaust strewn across the shop floor was ever intended to go on my car. DIAL 1-800-BAV-AUTO. Well, they could image why I had the wrong exhaust. Maybe because Remus doesn't make one for my car? we'll get to that later. First they offered to have it shipped back and try again with another Remus. At this point my car was without any exhaust and I was not prepared ti wait another six months for the part. Option Two: BavAuto actually offered to trade my Remus for a Tri-Flow. This sounded too good to be true, but in the mean-time the tech guys at BavAuto had been talking to my mechanic, and had figured out a way to attach the Remus.
"We'll help with the extra labor."
Then my mechanic called again. "This thing is a mess...are you sure you don't want to get a replacement that actually fits?" He didn't want to do it, I could tell. This guy's shop regularly restores vintage Jaguars and Aston Martins. At any time, his shop has a million dollars worth of cars in it. Over the years this has tempered his view of things.
"Its only a BMW, Justin. If it were a Bugatti or something, then I'd love to do it."
DIAL 1-800-BAV-AUTO. Turns out they won't exchange the Remus for a Tri-Flow, but they'll give me $100 off a Tri-Flow. I'll leave the justness of this exchange to you, but I wasn't pleased. Adding up the cost for the Tri-Flow and the installation of the Tri-Flow, and the time without my car, I decided it was better to have the shop fit the Remus and take BavAuto up on their offer to "help with the labor".
The exhaust went on in no time after that. The work was well done. BCI is probably the best shop in Northern Westchester. The car drives well, and I am pleased...sort of. Bavarian Autosport's final concession to seven months of pounding headaches and general annoyance, and two weeks without a car and untold amounts of frustration: One hour of labor - $65.
I wan't really prepared to do anything about until...
THE PLOT THICKENS!!!
I'm not sure how much more thickening of the plot I can handle, but I can't pass this up. I have come into possession of a current Remus catalogue and guess what...they don't have an exhaust for my car. See for yourself:
The final chapter of this story is that Bavarian Autosport coughed up the money for the custom install. This retores my faith in humanity. It makes me happy when a company is willing to admit it made a mistake and is also willing to make it right. Because Bav Auto came through and passed this customer relations test, they have a loyal customer. Lets hope that they can maintain this reputation in the years to come.
I'd like to thank everyone that sent helpful e-mails or contributed to the discussion. This little episode has reinforced the incredible value that can be placed on the communication facilitated by the internet. Because someone in the Netherlands was able to e-mail me a scanned copy of the current Remus catalogue after reading this story, I was able to approach Bav Auto armed with unrefutable evidence of wrong-doing. This kind of mutual assistance is what the internet is all about. I figure that others can benefit from this collaboration as well. To this end, I am currently building a database backed M42 web site and registry to facilitate this internet based communication among M42 owners.
Click here to see if I think the exhaust makes a big difference in performance.
Comments?